Foreigners who’ve never lived in Japan love to compliment the country on its relative safety. Sadly, that safety is partly a myth engendered by fudged prosecutorial statistics and the marginalization of sexual assault. But statistically, the country does boast a low to moderate crime rate, including a low murder rate.
That doesn’t mean that Japan is immune to petty crimes, such as theft. In fact, one item – the common umbrella – is snatched so often that lately, some aspiring citizens have come up with clever ways to prevent people from pinching their parasols.
Bicycle and Umbrella Theft: Japan’s Most Popular Criminal Sports
Spend enough time in Japan and you realize that there are two items that are famously pinched.
The first are bicycles. Japan is chock full of bicycles; in 2016, 54% of the population owned bikes – and that number continues to grow. While that isn’t enough to put it in the top eight of bicycling countries worldwide, it’s still a whole lotta bikes.
Sadly, with a whole lotta bikes comes a whole lotta crime. In 2018, Japan’s National Police Agency said police agencies received 184,000 reports of stolen bikes. Police only made about 12,000 arrests in connection with bicycle crime, however. So bicycle theft not just common – it’s easy to get away with. The problem is especially acute in Tokyo, where number crunchers have identified one street in particular – 5-Choume in Kamada, Oota Ward – as a hotspot for bike theft.
As already mentioned, the other oft-stolen item is umbrellas. It’s not uncommon for hotels, office buildings, and convenience stores to have racks where customers can rest their umbrellas outside as they do their business inside. And it’s not uncommon for some random to pinch one during Japan’s rainy season. While cheap vinyl umbrellas available at convenience stores for between USD $5 and $7 are prime targets, more expensive products are by no means exempt. Indeed, entire articles and discussion board threads in Japanese exist discussing how to avoid this minor but irritating issue.
“This Is How The Ripped-Off Owner Will Look”
Advice on how to prevent umbrella theft varies. Some suggest not buying cheap conbini vinyl umbrellas; but, against, that doesn’t always prevent theft. Others suggest putting a Japan Police Agency seal on the handle to deter would-be thieves.
But recently, some enterprising Japanese Twitter users have put forth their own unique solutions to umbrella theft. User N-Box used a 3D printer to make a handle for his umbrella that sports a pleading face (Japanese: ぴえん顔; pien-gao). He says in his post, which was shared over 40,000 times:
“Made this cover to try and appeal to the conscience of convenience store umbrella thieves. This is how the ripped-off owner will look. ‘Please, for the love of God, don’t take me’”
The TV morning program Sukkiri! highlighted unique solutions from other users as well. One user created labels for their umbrella handles that range from gentle notifications (“I’ll be back in 5 minutes”) to Orwellian threats (“I’m watching you”, with the kana characters written in katakana instead of hiragana for emphasis).
Another man, an IT engineer, ran with this idea and took it one step further: taped a non-functioning IC card to his umbrella’s handle with the words “GPS Testing Device” stuck next to it. Apparently, the empty threat of tracking down the thief’s whereabouts has been an effective deterrent.
A Little Bit of Meiwaku
Pundits have spilled a lot of ink over the Japanese word meiwaku (迷惑; trouble, annoyance). People in Japanese society use it a lot to signal to other people that their actions are disruptive to others, or to the group as a whole. Stealing someone’s umbrella out from under their nose is certain to cause its owner meiwaku. However, it’s also a largely invisible crime. The owner isn’t there to see it happen. What’s more, no one in the surrounding vicinity will be any the wiser that you took an umbrella that isn’t yours. Umbrella theft may be more than just a crime of convenience. Perhaps it’s also a way to blow off steam via a small spat of anti-social behavior.
While certainly a minor crime in the grand scheme of things, Japan’s umbrella theft problem is a reminder that, no matter how “polite” Japan is regarded by the outside world, some people will still take whatever small opportunities they’re given to stick it to others.
